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MKR Instant Restaurant 5: Would You Like Tits With That?

4 Feb

debmkr

So this was a whole long post and then WordPress decided to be a revision saving CUNT and, long story short: DIE, WORDPRESS, DIE!

Rico is beyond crushed because the Deb and Rick episode was one of his favourites and there was so much suggestive sluttery he felt torn between drinking and clapping the entire way through (he chose drinking).

Because I don’t have the time to write the whole damn thing again, here is a short and, hopefully, forgivably quick summary. (Note: if you find it unforgivable, go fuckoffwithoyourjudgeyselves)

Shopping: long trip to buy fish. Deb spews. Doesn’t appear to brush teeth on return to house.

Restaurant: Theme is Sexy Deb having sex with Less Sexy Rick. Rico reckons so hot he can feel the furnace.

Prep: Still no brushing of teeth. Deb fucks up the custard and uses her car spew as inspiration for plating.

Team arrival: WA whores hope they fail; Paul and Blair looking forward to getting neck-deep in Naughty Nana’s Corner. Blonde twin spills champagne on Kelly with an ‘ooops’ that sounds remarkably similar to a ‘takethatcunt’.

Pete and Manu arrival: Deb refuses to let Petey see her tits. Manu lets all teams know he’ll be staying up late and not to wait up. No sign judges smell chunderous breath.

Entrée: Pete and Manu object to the spew plating. Chloe likens it to her last breakfast.

Main Prep: Manu walks in on Deb playing her fish fiddle, rather than brushing her damn teeth.

Main: Looks like… fish and two veg.

Dessert prep: Cake is crap. Diners wait three hours. Deb still doesn’t brush her teeth.

Dessert: Yawn.

Verdict: 69 – HAHAHAHAHAHA!

No kisses tonight, lovers, I’m too upset

Flawless

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